Born to Win—Not to Fail: How Head Games Work Against Your Success

My goal is to make 50 people into millionaires in five years. Sound crazy? Would you like to be one of them? The place to start is in your head. Why? Because that is where your brain lives.

Three pounds of tissue, blood, chemicals, hormones, fat, and water help form your personality, character, and destiny. If you are not yet grateful for the ability to think—let alone succeed —you should be.

From that masterfully entangled web of neurons comes the ability to create a new outcome—but only if you have the willingness and courage to do it.

Failure—the path of least resistance

Loosely considered to be your system of beliefs, expectations, and aspirations, your mindset is the most powerful tool you have to become a successful entrepreneur. Instead of set in concrete, though, your mind must be set for the next development, the next idea—and the next day.

In your miraculous mind is the ability to create, achieve, and live your dreams. The opportunity to fail is equally accessible—and a lot easier. Do any of these circumstances sound familiar?

• Your early life was not easy—in fact, it was tough and not very comfortable. You made some decisions, turned some directions, formed a business, and it failed. You formed another and you are doing okay. You work too much, though, and you wonder if this is all there is to life. Those long-ago rough circumstances of childhood sometimes seem too near. You will never be a true success.

• It was a great job that made a good career. You rose through the ranks, developed skills, and saw personal and professional success. From the back of your mind came the thought that you might want to get off this ride and create a business you could lead and still enjoy life. You planned, and one day made the move with a good business plan. You landed safely, but are struggling. Your product and pitch are good but the dream is not what it seemed. Some doors have closed behind you. Was it a mistake?

• You lay awake again last night. Your business has its ups and downs, but you cannot break through. Lately, the numbers have not been good—but they should be. You listen to people, make changes, switch tactics, but deep down, you wonder if you have the ability or the ideas to really make your business work.

For entrepreneurs, it is easy to focus on operational challenges. Less obvious are ingrained habits as old as you are that drive your business goals into a wall. These head games prohibit good ideas from growing, and successful businesses from thriving.

I help my clients thrive, achieve financial freedom, and enjoy life. But my first job is to listen and learn. In addition to business status and numbers, I listen for the story that makes the map, the underlying paths that are leading good business people in a direction they do not want to go. I listen for head games.

And sometimes what I find, along with a fear of failure, is a fear of success.

Failure has something to offer

In a TED talk in 2012, Regina Dugan, the former director of the Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency (DARPA) asked an old question, “What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?”

In her talk, Ms. Dugan details successful projects—like the internet—developed in an atmosphere free from of worry of failure. Is it realistic to set failure aside? No. Is it worth considering? Yes.

I work with small business owners that fear failure—and fear success. Conflicting thoughts warn of failure, even as they caution of success. Mental and emotional toughness is needed to hear these thoughts and cultivate their energy. How does that work? Consider this:

• Fear of failure: By itself, a healthy concern about failing is smart. Small failures can lead to huge success as you fine-tune skills and strategies. For confident business owners, small failures hone creativity. The bottom line is to keep such failures in perspective and learn from them.
• Fear of success: Fear of achievement can be deep-seated. Many people do not know what success looks like—they just know they want it. When it arrives, the tension and choices are sometimes hard to handle. Instead of opting for the familiarity of failure, take a step into success by joining a group of small business owners who understand your fears and help you find your future.

Head games are preconceived notions of self, and of business, that trip up entrepreneurs on a daily basis. I work hard to help business owners embrace new ideas, find new solutions, and accept a new paradigm for their lives—one of success.

If at first you don’t succeed—call me at 585-633-7563.

To your success,

Bob Britton